1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Randomize
