I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
