Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
