Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.

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(978): every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y. http://tfl.nu/xtds

Replies (60) Good night (2872) Bad night (1135)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.

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(763): i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells. http://tfl.nu/8di1

Replies (83) Good night (1251) Bad night (17421)
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(574): View more from Indiana

pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.

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(574): pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face. http://tfl.nu/q45o

Replies (42) Good night (1617) Bad night (5272)
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(440): View more from Ohio

So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.

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(440): So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles. http://tfl.nu/gk4i

Replies (12) Good night (7493) Bad night (981)
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(201): View more from New Jersey

It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.

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(201): It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar. http://tfl.nu/427l

Replies (8) Good night (3495) Bad night (1066)
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(520): View more from Arizona

The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.

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(520): The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out. http://tfl.nu/jqhp

Replies (5) Good night (2478) Bad night (1147)
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(314): View more from Missouri

the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.

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(314): the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier. http://tfl.nu/vyfv

Replies (6) Good night (4304) Bad night (1276)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.

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(724): You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room. http://tfl.nu/1sdd

Replies (7) Good night (1251) Bad night (3556)
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(541): View more from Oregon

Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.

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(541): Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused. http://tfl.nu/dae0

Replies (9) Good night (1990) Bad night (822)
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(607): View more from New York

I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.

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(607): I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable. http://tfl.nu/31u9

Replies (9) Good night (566) Bad night (1549)
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(850): View more from Florida

Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?

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(850): Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes? http://tfl.nu/yaod

Replies (2) Good night (1013) Bad night (422)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up

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(215): When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up http://tfl.nu/2k98

Replies (9) Good night (535) Bad night (2086)
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(303): View more from Colorado

they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.

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(303): they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola. http://tfl.nu/27bk

Replies (3) Good night (574) Bad night (2312)
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(954): View more from Florida

Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk

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(954): Some guy in the bathroom just took his shirt off and proceeded to tell me the story behind all of his stab wounds. That's what I get for making small talk http://tfl.nu/mlfk

Replies (3) Good night (404) Bad night (730)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.

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(203): It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of. http://tfl.nu/uox7

Replies (1) Good night (778) Bad night (396)

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