moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
4 words: hood of his car
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Just pee around me
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Randomize
