i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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