just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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