i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
