yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
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My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
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We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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