How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
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he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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