I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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