I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
