okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize