Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize