i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
