Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
