jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
Randomize
