when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
Randomize
