Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
