She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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