The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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