Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Randomize
