The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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