some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
