i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize