Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Boobs speak an international language.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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