new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
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