I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Bagel with cream cheese. It's blowing my fucking mind.
How high are you right now..
I MICROWAVED IT. SIGNIFICANT IMPROVEMENT.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
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