this beer tastes like vomit already
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
