why didn't you poke me back
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
