Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
i was born a porn star she said
I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
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Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
the liver wants what the liver wants
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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