I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Only my sister would update her facebook status while going into labor.
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
