Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
Randomize
