who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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