i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
