That's intense
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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