ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
