Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
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