just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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