Do vagina's smell?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
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