Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
