Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
We got so high we made milksteak
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Randomize