Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize