Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Randomize