I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
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Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
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