How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
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