on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
Randomize
