Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Randomize
