Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I decided I'm going to give him a celebratory fuck for his accomplishments. Knocked on his door, handed him some condoms and said "I'll be over tonight with sex and booze"
I want to be you.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Can u pick me up? Lost my keys.
Sure. FYI- you "lost" them on the roof, trying to throw them over the house.
Randomize
