I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
Randomize
